Business Expenses
Season 1, Episode 1
Air date February 7, 2015
Starring Noah as himself
Peter as himself
Written by Peter
Length 2:33
Episode guide
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None "The Intervention"

Business Expenses is the first Peterpotomus video of Season 1 and also the first ever Peterpotomus video.

Watch Edit

Premise Edit

Noah isn't happy when Peter uses Peterpotomus money to make extravagant purchases.

Script Edit

[2:36 P.M. on a Tuesday.]

[Noah is doing taxes in the basement. He sees something he apparently strikes as odd and looks over at Peter.]

Noah: Peter.

[Camera cuts to Peter, who is asleep under a pile of trash on the couch. He awakens and looks over at Noah.]

Noah: It says someone spent one-hundred and twenty-five dollars on mayonnaise. Was that you?

[Camera again cuts to Peter, who is now on his back playing a video game on the couch.]

Peter: Oh, yeah, that's, uh, just consider that a business expense.

Noah: Peter, we're not a business. You can't go buying one-hundred and twenty-five dollars worth of mayonnaise.

[Peter shoots Noah a goofy smile that displays apathy.]

Noah: Sure, whatever, just don't--don't do it again.

[5:14 on a Wednesday.]

[Peter is using his laptop on the couch when Noah angrily storms in.]

Noah: Seven thousand dollars? Jesus Christ!

Peter: Uh, yeah, I know what you're thinking, but--

Noah: What'd you even spend it on?

Peter: A rubber duck.

Noah: One rubber duck?

Peter: That's correct.

Noah: Why? Why would you spend seven thousand dollars on a single rubber duck?

Peter: It was pretty large. At least the size of a Subway sub. And, uh, you know, business expense.

Noah: Why would any business buy a rubber duck for seven thousand dollars?

Peter: You have to have something to put in the lobby.

[Noah clenches his fists and walks off, muttering to himself.]

Peter: Bye.

[5:48 later that same day.]

[Noah and Peter are both sitting at the table, using their phones and also playing a game of chess. Noah's ringtone, which is "Space Jam" by Quad City DJ's, sounds off and Peter's phone also sounds off.]

Noah: Sweet, someone bought him.

Peter: My order went through. What are you selling?

Noah: I had to sell my brother because of your fiscal irresponsibility. We're so much in debt, I had to sell a family member of mine.

Peter: Funny enough, I bought him. With your credit card.

[Noah stares at Peter in dead silence and then flips the chessboard in anger. The screen goes black. Noah appears with a horrified face in black and white and he makes a slowed-down screeching utterance. Some text pops up that says, "Noah went on to live in a homeless shelter, where he spent the rest of his days." The screen cuts to Peter's smirk from the first scene also in black and white, and the text says, "Peter prospered as the CEO of Peterpotocorp, world-renowned for his lobby."]


Trivia Edit

  • Filming took place on January 4th, 2015.
  • Only Peter and Noah appear in the video, and while Trey helped to film and with audio, Allen was completely absent and not involved. The Peterpotomus gang's only filming opportunity came when Allen was staying over at a friend's house, and they just had to film without him.
  • Though a general outline was created, there was no actual script written before filming, and though Peter and Noah had a general idea of what they had to say, they basically improvised most of it.

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